Posted by MrG 207.231.75.131 using Mozilla/4.5 [en] (Win98; I) on March 30, 2000 at 16:11:14:
In Reply to: Uhm.. it was my sad, sad attempt at the "subtle sarcasm" you use so well.. =P nt posted by Triuken on March 29, 2000 at 18:27:54:
For subtlety: 1 Dictionary (boiled)
1 immensley under-challenged wit (un-boiled)
3 large glasses of Vodka (preferrably Russian)
Directions: Read dictionary five times and make approximately 70
doodles in each margin in the shape of the Chinese symbol
for all the words on the page. Give up in despair after a half a
page and the realization you don't know Chinese, which could present
somewhat of a problem. Drink half a glass of vodka, and steady yourself.
Repeat for second half of glass. Proceed to dance in circles, chanting.
Dip heavily boiled dictionary in vodka. Repeat. Place
dictionary in secluded spot to prevent finding and proceed
to drink vodka.
For sarcasm: 1 Trig class filled with people who have way too much time on their
hands (boiled or un-boiled, the former reccomended)
1 Creative Writing class very similar to Trig class (dipped in hot oil)
1 large plate of Pie a'la Mode
1 large slab of California Cheese (preferrably Spyder's homemade variety)
57 large glasses of vodka (preferrably Russian)
1 Coconut Monkey drink (refer to PCGamer's disc, Coconut Monkey section)
Gather classes in large room, and proceed to stir well and vigourously (until
mushy). Then feed classes cheese until they are quite full. Tell 3 jokes to each
person (preferrably unfunny ones) until they are all quite confused. Give them each
50 glasses of vodka. Usher them out of the room, one by one, except for seven people.
Take all glasses of vodka from the people that left the room, and if anyone tries to drink
any, proceed to confuse and torture them with an endless stream of pointless Crossing
Road jokes. Example ("Why did I cross the road? I didn't. Ha ha ha, get it?") Do not offer
anyone tea, as it is not in the ingredients (moron). Give 7 people 7 glasses of vodka. Drink
20 yourself. Proceed to forcibly take the 7 glasses away and smash them over the people's
heads in ritual fashion. Drink 25 more glasses of vodka. Drive, fly, or otherwise propel yourself
Oroville, California, where you will give me your remaining 5 glasses of vodka and your Coconut Monkey
drink.
For =P: 1 large tounge of Triuken's (preferrably ground up and sauteed)
8 large glasses of.. well, what do you think?
1 computer (un-boiled)
Drive to Germany, where you will find Triuken eating dirt, and give
him computer. Chop off his tounge and dispose of it in a sanitary fashion.
Then, have him log onto the message board
where he will type a message containing the phrase: =P. Proceed to propel him in
some (preferrably painful) way back to Germany so he may resume eating dirt.
Proceed to drink vodka.
Mike
DISCLAIMER: I have never drank anything besides 7up and various un-colas (and
non alcoholic beverges) in my life. Honest.